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Lost

If somebody said to you that you can stop working tomorrow and do whatever you want …

you would think that most people would think ‘brilliant’….I’ll have some of that.

I have always thought that I would leap at the opportunity – fishing, biking, walking, reading ….maybe a bit of writing. I’d imagined myself starting the day with reading the papers, fresh coffee brewing on the stove. I’d walk the dog along the nearby river spotting the fish that I would catch later in the day. I’d maybe pop back home to add a few pages to my latest novel and perhaps book a table at a local restaurant or theatre…

Each day would be bliss.

However the reality of the situation that I’m in …..has left me a little ….lost.

I’m thinking that this is because it’s been forced on me rather than it being my choice…It could also be that because I’ve been working for so much of my life for so long – that I don’t actually know how to do anything else.

I’m having to actually physically force myself not to work. I find myself going to make a phone call or send an e-mail… then I go – ‘no …stop ….if you do that you’re right back in the thick of it again’.

Not taking my phone everywhere is like ripping my arm off and leaving it on the kitchen table.

I’m also left with a nagging feeling that I’m letting everyone down? My wife, my kids, my work colleagues…even my mother.

Everyone that relied on me suddenly has to fend for themselves.

The really stupid thing is that none of the people mentioned would even stop to think that I was letting them down – it’s all in my head…

So…

Mike Clough the man with all the answers,

Mike Clough the tough, dependable, business mastermind….

…is actually a bit of a lost cause at the moment….mind in neutral.

Bear with me everyone …the arrogant bastard will be back – he’s just on forced sick leave at the moment.

Mike C