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My Car’s Rubbish

Author: Mike Clough

Date Posted: Wednesday 1st March 2023

My car is so clever …it’s become rubbish at driving.

If I try and reverse off my drive, it senses that there’s a car coming down Snake Pass about half a mile away and it won’t let me move. It slams on the brakes and makes bleeping noises and flashes the dashboard with red lights.

By the time this has cleared, the car that was way in the distance is now close enough to warrant NOT reversing out …so I sit and wait.

I then engage reverse and low and behold …cue another car a mile or so away …which activates the emergency braking and flashing lights maneuver.

When I finally get off the drive and head over Snake Pass, there is a point just past the old Snake Inn where there is a lay-by on the side of the road after a left hand corner – every time I pass this, the car slams the brakes full on and the screen advises me that a collision has just been avoided.

There was no collision avoided – but the Physio costs for managing my now damaged spine and neck are considerable.

When driving in the dark in heavy rain. it’s good to know that you have driving sensors which will assist you if danger arises. My car simply says – ‘Driver aids inactive due to poor visibility’. So what we’re saying here is that in clear visibility your driver aids will slam on without warning for no apparent reason ….but when they’re needed …they’re inactive.

I just can’t wait for driver less cars …the roads will be so much quieter because nobody will be getting off their drives.

 

Mike C

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Mike Clough

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