Crap, crap …. crap

Is crap the new black?

Can anybody name me anything that’s actually improved in recent times? I’m talking pretty broad range here I know…but bear with me.

I bought a new Audi RS6 recently, it’s the third one I’ve had …and strangely it’s by far the worst one of the three. You would think progress would have smoothed a few wrinkles, new design would have maybe improved power output, or maybe made the car a little more frugal on the petrol usage.

But no, dear reader …what we have is a car that is blisteringly quick …but not very well built. Stuff drops off. Not major stuff, just door handles and wiper blades and stone chip protectors. Oh, and the electrics are a joke.

In my previous dealings with Audi, I knew that drivers’ mats would be tissue paper thin and that they would not be able to do a quality product. Through digging around a few years back I found a company called Ambassdor. I chased up my contact at Ambassador mats and found that they have ceased trading – Ambassador mats were brilliant – great product, great company – not cheap but good quality – and now they are no longer in business.

Googling around the internet I found another company professing to offer the same product as Ambassador. I ordered the mats and they were delivered yesterday – and they are …. absolute crap. Straight in the bin.

Socks, underpants – the mainstay of the British gentleman’s wardrobe – all rubbish. You wash them once they shrink and you can’t wear them again.

Shampoo, deodorant, soap – all last about five minutes.

Perfumes from Tom Ford might smell great …but they cost more than your life savings and last about a week.

Food from Marks and Spencer – I used to walk 2 miles at lunch to get a M and S prawn sandwich – they now taste like something nasty died and fell between two slices of bread. Uuurrrggghhhh just nasty.

Pork pies – again just do not taste like they used to.

Bread – as previous.

Beer – rubbish.

Peanut butter – bluurggh what’s happened?

Water – tastes like a chemical spill.

Vegetables – all taste the same.

Fruit – all seems to have been frozen.

Something is going on with the world whereby quality and innovation are being left behind and all we are left with is cheap shite.


Mike C


0161 723 2000