Driverless Cars…. January 13, 2016

There are few things in life that are as enjoyable as driving a perfectly tuned car along a twisting turning road using accelerator and gears to get the best out of the vehicle. Man and machine working in perfect harmony. The boys in blue have done a fairly decent job of ruining this experience by hiding behind walls and jumping out on the unsuspecting motorist and zapping them with speed guns….fining and adding points to your licence with relish.

To me – they are missing the point.

Accidents aren’t caused just by speed, they are generally caused by somebody miss judging velocity into a corner or by simply driving like a dick. But how many of these ‘d**ks’ do you see getting stopped by the police…none, you just don’t….because the police aren’t set up to catch this sort of idiot, they’re set up to catch the middle class tax paying, hard worked business man trying to get from A to B fast enough to make his business profitable ….easy prey.

These guys (like me) have been brought up to respect the law and to kowtow to anybody wearing a uniform…so we pay up, we slow down for a few miles then get back into the habit or earning a living. In most cases these guys aren’t… ‘bad drivers’… (apart from the odd nutter taking a call on his mobile without using hands free)… Bad drivers are the drunken, uninsured, non-road tax paying idiots that always seem to get away scott free – go out and catch them please Mr Policeman.

So already my little bit of enjoyment is being eroded by knowing that on any journey that I do – I could easily lose my licence simply because I’m running late and need to put my foot down a bit. Not happy with this curb on my enthusiasm for driving some idiot is now suggesting…’driverless cars’.

Driverless f*****g cars…?

How about calling it a… ‘lifeless life…’

How about we take everything that we enjoy doing in life and get some flippin machine to do it for you?

This is all about ‘The Establishment’ making us do things that ‘they’ want us to do. The rich knobs that rule the Country don’t actually like driving…because…they don’t ever actually do it….as they have a chauffeur called Rodney who runs them everywhere.

Somebody somewhere has told them that the ‘plebs’ who do all the actual work in the country …are rapidly killing themselves in high speed crashes which happen due to their inability to afford a chauffeur so they’ve decided that driverless cars are the answer.

After all…if all us plebs can’t be trusted to drive ourselves and keep killing each other …who for f***s sake is going to cut their lawns, clean their toilets…..or get rid of their Japanese Knotweed problems.

Driverless bloody cars…

FFS.

 

Mike C

The Others – Invasive Plants Seminar January 13, 2016

Wednesday 25th May 2016
MOSI, Manchester
10.00am until 3.00pm

For the last ten years or so, Japanese Knotweed Solutions have held a seminar where we get the most informed members of the non-native species ‘world’ to get us up to speed on all things ‘invasive.

Previous years have seen us mainly focus on Japanese Knotweed – looking at changes in legislation and the Governments bio-control strategies as managed by CABI. This year, however, we are broadening our horizons and will be looking at …The Other’s….. (as in the ‘other’ problem species)

We have Trevor Renals (Senior Technical Advisor on Invasive Species at the Environment Agency) talking about what other problems the Environment Agency have on their ever expanding list of invading species. Trevor will be touching on the complexities surrounding budgets and priorities within the EA and what we can expect from future management strategies.

We also have Olaf Booy from The Non Native Species Secretariat, who are responsible for helping to coordinate the approach to invasive non-native species in Great Britain. Olaf will be talking about what problems they see on the horizon and how best we can prepare for and manage any new problems that arrive on our shores. He will also be talking about stopping these type of species BEFORE they become a problem and how legislation will enable this to happen.

Dick Shaw will be joining us from CABI (Centre for Agriculture and Biosciences International) to give updates on the Governments current bio-control strategy for Japanese knotweed as well as hinting at future plans for an additional bio attack on JK. Hopefully, Dick will also give us the lowdown on how the Himalayan balsam rust is coping with our British climate and whether we will be seeing any die back of balsam this season – fingers crossed for a good result!

Speaking in the ‘defence’ of plants will be Mr. Chris Baines – author and TV personality – a lover of plants and all things ‘wild’ in the garden. Whilst we in the ‘control industry’ give plants a bad name, Chris, will be looking at why these invasive plants have thrived and what we should be doing within our garden to encourage the ‘right’ plants to fight back.

As usual, we will be trying to bring some theatre to the proceedings with a Hollywood themed entrance and red carpet treatment for all guests. Be prepared for shock, horror and a little bit of awe…anybody who is of a nervous disposition should perhaps think twice about coming along.

Due to content – an OVER 18 certificate has been issued – may be some NUDITY – and occasional OFFENSIVE LANGUAGE (… if the PowerPoint doesn’t work…)

Mike Clough will be introducing the speakers as well as opening the day by launching the latest marketing campaign from JKSL on an unsuspecting public.

Lunch will be provided, as well some surprise entertainment – which went down such a storm at last year’s event!

To get your ticket for Wednesday 25th May, please download the booking form here and return to [email protected]