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You know you want me to write about Mike Clough playboy extraordinaire …fast cars, loose women, casino’s, lap dancing bars …Mike Clough 007….a legend in his own mind.

Actually I think many of my problems may stem from reading too many James Bond novels at a very formative age. Much of my ‘love making’ technique stems from these early novels that I read by torchlight beneath the bedsheets …my wife is now a little fed up of me trying to undo her bra with my magnetic watch strap.. 🙁

So what you really want to know is ….does Mike Clough lead a glamorous life.

Well – the answer I’m afraid is …no.

I may have an Aston Martin, I may have a Performance Audi RS6 …but in reality all this means is that I spend a lot of time driving all over the bloody country. The reason behind the car fetish is simply the idea that if I’m going to spend a lot of time in a car …I might as well be in a nice car.

I may eat in nice restaurants in London and I may be a black card holder in some of the most exclusive places to eat and drink ….but…if you are on your own – to be honest – I’d much rather be with the Mrs in our local. The reason behind the restaurant fetish is the idea that if I’m going to eat away from home….I might as well eat in a nice restaurant.

I’ve always had a bit of a ‘bee’ in my head about where I sleep too ….you’ve guessed it …if I’m going to be away from home I might as well stay somewhere nice.

All in all, I’ve developed a routine that may leave some people baffled – but it makes a kind of sense to me. I’ve never understood the type of person that looks for the cheapest possible place to eat/drink/whatever …and drives a bloody Nissan X Trail. I say I’ve never understood – that’s not quite true – I’m now at a point in my life when I can safely say I don’t really care what other people do…it’s irrelevant.

I live in Glossop yet have another house in Alport near Bakewell – about 45 minutes away. Loads of people have said – ‘….why do you have a second home that’s so near? You could have had a place in Portugal or Spain for what you paid?’

Well – yes I could – but to me…what the bloody hell would I want to go to Portugal for? ….and what does Spain have to offer…? Bull fights..? Yeah right …must go there to live.

Alport has some of the best scenery in the UK with the Peak National Park – it’s got the best fly fishing a man could wish for …and mountain biking trails that never end – with the best people you could ever wish to meet* – (*NB apart from the dodgy couple at Rock House)

So not too glamorous I’m afraid – it’s all done for a practical reason.

I think one of the things I’ve seen a little too often is business men who scrape their way through life in a cheap suit and a crappy car with the intention of enjoying their retirement….?

Then they hit retirement and die.

My theory is to go through life in an expensive suit driving an Aston Martin…. with no intention of retiring ….ever.

I don’t hit retirement ….and …I don’t die.

Watch this space…

Mike C