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Men.

I have a growing suspicion that ‘men’ are to be phased out in the near future. Men are no longer the dominant partner in relationships and are in fact consigned to menial jobs around the house such as bin emptying and spider removal.

We read that sperm is no longer required in the process of reproduction and that women can conceive without the need for candlelight and roses.

In the job market women are paid more than men and are so revered that nobody speaks to them in fear of falling into the #metoo trap.

Personally, I’m terrified of being alone with any woman as I know something stupid and sexist will come out of my mouth if given a prolonged period of ‘one to one’ conversation.

So, I avoid it.

I avoid women because I’m scared.

Where did it all go wrong??

I think it was when somebody decided that equality wasn’t the answer. They decided that instead of equality – women should jump straight to…. superiority.

For me this first came to light in advertising. We men all know it’s wrong to leer at women and shout out to our mates to all come and leer as well. We ignorant males know this – so why don’t the women in the Diet Coke adverts know this as well???

Why is it the lady in the Malteser advert thinks it’s ok to raise her top and flash her boobs – when again we men know that this is wrong.

Greek yoghurt advertisers think it’s ok to have women eating their product from a group of scantily clad hunky men – when if the roles were reversed, the company would be ceasing trading from the barrage of complaints they would get.

Push up bras have been binned in favour of push up y-fronts… (I do quite like mine …;-)….)

Men have stopped going to lap dancing clubs because they’ve been vilified for this behavior ….but its ok for women to scream and throw themselves at the male dancers on ‘Magic Mike XXL’….this is deemed acceptable….duuuh explain please.

So, all in all the future is pretty bleak for the male species.

No wonder there’s so many people going gender neutral – they’re all hedging their bets.

Mike C