Ego… November 4, 2015

What’s it all about?

What is… ‘it’… anyway…? Life’s rich pageant…what are we actually trying to achieve? What is the secret of life…hmmm

A few years ago I thought I had the answer, l then I woke up and it was all a dream.

I come across all sorts of people in my role as a company owner ….some people are real stress heads and work every hour that god sends…others just float along enjoying every day and just being chilled out about everything.

Take my Father in Law for example. Everybody loves Ben. Everybody.

I have never met anybody that didn’t like him – he is the most likeable, funny, interesting bloke you would ever want to spend time with. He worked for me for over five years and I didn’t ever hear a word said against him by anybody.

Yet…. he has no drive, no ambition, no lust for material things, he’s not bothered about having a new car, not bothered about a new watch, doesn’t want a new house….nothing gets him fired up….ever. If he has enough money to go for a pint occasionally he’s happy. And even if he doesn’t have enough money for a pint he isn’t too bothered because he knows somebody will buy him one because he’s so well liked.

Now if you take me as an alternative example. Nobody likes me. Nobody.

I’ve never met anybody that liked me – I am a most unlikeable character. I think I’m funny (apparently I’m not) – and most people don’t really want to spend any time with me. I’ve never worked for anybody other than myself ….probably due to me thinking I’m cleverer than everybody else.

Yet…I am driven, I want the best of everything that the world has to offer…I lust after every new gadget that comes on the market …yet by the time I buy anything I’ve already moved on to the next ‘thing’ that I want. I never have less than £500 in my wallet and never allow anybody to buy me a drink.

But dear reader, who is right?

Ben – I am sure will live to a ripe old age cossetted by everybody who loves and cares about him.

I – will probably die from stress related illness or will simply explode in a fit of rage when some new accessory to the i-phone is unavailable…

Much of what I have done with my life has been about ‘ego’ – some sort of testosterone fuelled assault on everybody I’ve come across – men have been either ‘competition’ or ‘useful contact’…. and women have been objectified or boxed into neat packages of ‘wife, work colleague, accountant, sister in law, mother in law ..’

But….things are changing as I age.

The testosterone levels are falling into a manageable category, I haven’t hit anyone in ages, I let people over take me on roads …and I even have some male and  female friends…. that are just ‘friends’.

The ego has deflated and I now consider myself to be a normal bloke …not a god.

Not sure anybody likes me…but …maybe there time to apologise to a few people and build some bridges?

 

Mike C